What kind of a doctor ARE you?

I was presenting a patient in morning rounds the other day. Morning rounds is where the whole kidney team gets together to hear about the new admissions and ongoing problems. Ours are not terribly formal, and we get interrupted frequently for pages, computer checks, etc. Still, rounds are a hallowed tradition in internal medicine, and the person speaking has the floor and the attention of the group.

So I was in the middle of my presentation when my pager goes off (again!). I look down and see my home number flashing. Now, last time the nanny paged me, we ended up in the ER, so I just muttered an "excuse me" and quickly called home. Fortunately, nothing too terrible was going on. But Jonathan had a nasty case of diaper rash and was crying with each change. He was also waddling around like a cowboy from the Wild West, trying to keep from chafing too much.

You can imagine my colleagues' surprise when I have returned a page, listened for a minute to the person on the other end of the line, and then start to dispense the following advice: "I think he needs to spend a lot of naked time today. It's not too hot, so can you just strip him down and spend some time on the back patio? And don't wipe the poops off too hard - just wash them away with some warm water." I turned back to resume my presentation to a lot of questioning faces.

*********************

Vocabulary watch: Up, hot, Mama, Dada, truck, dis, dat, doat, ap (apple). Doesn't yet say dog, but says "Woof woof!" when he sees one.

Seven calories in forty minutes.

We took our rare weekend off and drove up to Washington to see Grandma and Grandpa Kwon. It was perfect timing, since it was Father's Day and Grandma's birthday as well. We left early Saturday morning, and Jonathan didn't sleep the whole way up. He had a good time looking out the windows and dancing in his seat to the Beatles. When we arrived, he knew right away he had an attentive audience with Grandma. He loved dropping the golf balls into the practice putting green and watching them roll out again. He also showed off his little toy stroller, wheeling it around the living room. And he especially liked standing at the top of the two stairs leading down into the living room. He'd get so close his toes would curl over the edge, and we'd all be running towards him, before he'd grin and carefully plop one leg over.

Grandpa had some afternoon commitments, so Grandma came with us to Tyson's Corner. We had lunch at an Italian bistro, where Jonathan made his first attempt at picking up the check - he lifted the waitress' order pad right out of her apron. Once the food came, however, he settled down and dug in. Grandma was happy to pick all the best toppings off her pizza and assemble gourmet bites for Jonathan on the end of her fork. And every time the waitress brought anything over to the table, he let out a very excited "Ooooooh!"

Chris and I then took off in Grandma's Mercedes, and got to shop and see a movie - a rare treat! Grandma took Jonathan by church, where he smiled and flirted with all the ladies there. We got home around five and Grandma's little angel morphed into Mr. Fussybutt! He bit his Grandma on the shoulder before we hauled him up to sit in the playpen with some juice and a Fig Newton. He had a snack and a little rest and was in a much better mood.

Grandpa came home and we all drove to Woomi Garden for Korean barbecue. (Liz and Jim were away at Mort and Misty's wedding, or we would have loved to have them join us.) Jonathan got wide-eyed and did his "Ooooooh!" again as they brought out all the dishes. He came within half an inch of plunging his hands into the raw meat. Then the grill got hot and we started cooking. There were all sorts of fantastic things to eat - I was wondering what he'd like best.

Was it the meat? No, he carefully picked out the bits I gave him and set them aside. Was it the rice? One bite and after that he scrunched up his eyes and shook his head "no." Was it the radish and carrot strips in a sweet brine? They came out as soon as they went in. What Jonathan really loved, and devoted his entire evening to eating, was the bean sprouts in a little soy sauce and sesame oil. But he didn't like the bean portion, just the sprout. So he would carefully pick up each three inch-long sprout, pick off the bean, and throw it on the floor. Then he'd hold up the sprout and inspect it carefully for remaining bean traces. Then, and only then, would he eat the sprout. At the end of the night, I had to get down under the table and clean up - I had a whole napkin of beans, all neatly severed from their sprouts. Jonathan had a few spoonfuls of the sweet rice tea, and was ready to go home and go to bed.

Now we're talking!

Well, two words, at least. Actual words with all the vowels and consonants properly placed. So far, we've got "up" and "hot." "Hot" is always said in a breathy, Southern belle voice - I can't figure that out, either. And "up" comes in cycles of five to eight, and Jonathan usually laps himself, so it's more like "up up up up pup pup up." Still, it's great fun. In addition to the two words, Jonathan's learned to shake his head for both "no" and "yes," and in the cutest development to date, will shrug his shoulders when we pose too tough a question. Yesterday, Chris was playing with him in the living room when Jonathan made the "having a poop" face. Chris didn't want to make two trips in rapid succession, so he asked Jonathan "Do you need a new diaper?" Jonathan nodded yes. Then Chris asked "Are you all finished, or is there more coming?" And Jonathan cocked his head to the side, smiled, and gave a little shrug.

We've got new books and new interests, too! Trucks trucks trucks - if Jonathan masters "t" sounds we'll have his third word. I went to Barnes and Noble and bought a range of books in the "Things That Go" section - apparently a few other toddlers have loved trucks before. I never knew there were so many different types! I can now distinguish between a grader, a concrete crusher, and a treaded front loader. Jonathan has (finally!) ditched the potty book at bedtime. Now he reaches for "The Monster at the End of This Book" and points to Grover on each page with great glee. We are working on decreasing the whining - pointing - unh unh unh in favor of nicer manners. When prompted, Jonathan will sign "please" very nicely, and smile. For the Grover book, he'll toss in a clapping hands and sign "thank you" when I pick it up.