Lowes' is a little TOO helpful sometimes.

Jonathan has figured out that the little clinky things Mom and Dad carry around are what he wants most. He has been grabbing our keychains off the dining room table and running to the front door. He thinks if he waves them around the door will open and he can go OUTSIDE! And he screams bloody murder if we try to take the keys away, or even if we place them out of reach.

I wasn't too thrilled at the thought of playing "Find Mommy's keys" for the next two years, so I was happy when inspiration struck. I left work a little early today and hightailed it to Lowes' key cutting area. There I picked up a double ring keychain and one or two fancy key blanks in rainbow colors. I needed a few more to make that authentic "clank-clank" sound, though. I asked the salesman to give me a few more key blanks. Here's how the conversation went:

"May I help you, ma'am?"

"Yes, may I please have three blank keys."

"What size do you need?"

"The size doesn't matter. I'd just like three of the cheapest."

"But I need to know what size in order to cut them."

"I don't need them cut; I just need the blank keys."

"But ma'am, they won't open anything if I don't cut them."

"They're not going to open anything. Just the blank keys will be fine."

"Okay, but what size do you need?"

I have a feeling this could have gone on a while. Finally I told him they were for my son to play with, and I didn't need any sharp little notches cut into them. Jonathan is now the proud possessor of his own keychain, which he has not let go of since I got home fifty minutes ago.

Clink clank clink.